Tuesday, March 12, 2013

The Pub With No Dyke

     I collected this poem in the mid-1970s, its authorship apparently being that prolific producer of ballads, limericks, and jokes: Anonymous. For my readers outside Australia - I know I have a few - I should explain that the title is a parody of Slim Dusty's most famous song, The Pub With No Beer, and a "dyke" is a toilet, or lavatory. For those who speak American, that means the restroom where you don't rest, the bathroom without a bath, or the washroom where you wash only after the event - although my experiences in the U.S. suggest this is a custom honoured as much in the breach as in the observance.
     At any rate, here it is: -

The Pub With No Dyke

I'll tell you a story; it happened to me.
A new pub had opened and the beer flowed free.
I'd had several drinks and was full of mad talk,
When Mother Nature came calling and I went for a walk.